I completely understand that loving everyone is a commandment, and I strive to keep it. But sometimes, some people come into your pathway in life and well, it's hard. I'm not talking about people who offend or wrong me at all. I'm just talking about people who are kind of hard to like. So, can you love someone as a child of God, your brother or sister in the gospel without really liking them? Or if you truly love them as a child of God will you like them as a result?
I wasn't sure where to start this search. I began in the topical guide looking at things like friendship, brotherhood and sisterhood, and fellowship. And I looked up scriptures I thought might help. Here we go.
Started with D&C 88: 133: .... I salute you in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, in token or remembrance of the everlasting covenant, in which covenant I receive you to afellowship, in a determination that is fixed, immovable, and unchangeable, to be your bfriend and cbrother through the grace of God in the bonds of love ....
I took friend and brother to mean like and love here. Friend is to like as brother is to love. You can have like AND love THROUGH the grace (enabling power) of God. God's grace can lead us to like and love after we fulfill our covenant to fellowship. So I take this to mean that God will step in and help us to both like and love if we put forth the effort to fellowship. So now I need to figure out what it means to fellowship...
1 John 4: 16 - 17: .....God is love; and he that adwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him. 17 Herein is our love made perfect.....
We know the love of God. Let that love spread to others and once we 'dwell' in love, God will perfect our love. Same as above, grace can make up for our lack of liking once we start to love. The phrase "our love can become perfect" I take to mean that we can move beyond loving (as a fellow child of God) to liking. Perfect love would include liking I think. So, our part is to dwell in love/God. This maybe answers my question above- is it possible to love without liking? Probably not because once we really love (dwell in love) God will perfect it (liking).
Verse 18 was also instructive: There is no afear in blove; but perfect clove casteth out fear: because fear hath dtorment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.
This verse wasn't in my initial search, but it got me thinking. I never thought about fear entering the like/love equation before. Two thoughts: first, fear can prohibit fellowship (which we need to acquire grace in our love). We can fear we will run into them/have to spend time with them, fear of what they will say will bother you, fear you will encourage what you don't like about them, fear of having to judge them, etc etc. Fear is at the heart of a lot of it- must cast out all fear. Second thought is that fear prohibits faith and you must have faith God will help you begin to love and then perfect the love. So, must cast out all fears. How? D&C 38:30 "..if ye are prepared ye shall not fear..." So, how do I prepare to fellowship?
D &C 38: 24: ...and let every man esteem his brother as himself....
What does esteem mean? To treat? And who is our brother? First, let's look at what it means to esteem. The footnote under esteem lists
Deuteronomy 17:20: That his heart be not lifted up above his abrethren, and that he bturn not aside from the commandment, to the right hand, or to the left....
So from this we learn that to esteem means not thinking yourself as better or worse than your neighbor.
1 Cor 4: 6-7 that ye might learn in us not to think of men above that which is written, that no one of you be apuffed up for one against another.
7 For who maketh thee ato differ from another? and what hast thou that thou didst not breceive? now if thou didst receive it, why dost thou glory, as if thou hadst not received it?
We're all the same and we all received everything we have and are- (including some personality traits) from God. Therefore we can't view ourselves as higher than anyone in any regard.
Ok, now let's look at who our brother is. The footnote here lists
Acts 17: 26-34: ....and hath made of one blood all nations of men..... we are also his offspring.
So, everyone. Everyone is our brother. We are all offspring of God. We must love everyone- esteem every man (our brother) as ourselves.
Romans 15: 1-2: We then that are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to please ourselves. v2 Let not everyone of us please his neighbor for his good to edification.
Let us please our neighbors for THEIR good to edification- meaning please them- give them what they want.
Ok, so sorry if those last scriptures seemed jumbled- I didn't get a chance to take very good notes the last couple of days there on what I was thinking or linking it all back together, but here's the main point I kept coming back to with the question of liking those we love-- God will help us. And here's where it links well with last week's study of the atonement. When we put forth the effort to see and treat everyone as children of God and fellowship them- God will step in and strengthen us with His enabling power (grace or power of the atonement) to make our love perfect. I really believe God can help us like someone if we first try to love them.
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